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Recent Movie Reviews#8465
Seeing the reviews as almost overwhelmingly positive, I had high expectations. I figured, even if it only hit on a few notes, it would be entertaining. Alas, I was led astray, once again, by the Intertubes.
At the 1 hr mark, we finally had enough and walked out. Browsing carpet samples at Lowes was infinitely more entertaining than this piece of garbage. The only way to see this movie and feel any entertainment is to be completely stoned. I cannot fathom the source of all positive reviews I've seen online. I guess it's because there's some attempts early on at self deprecating humor as they make fun of all the cameos.
Some people must see it that way, but I do not. To me, it was nothing more than 107 minutes of a self-indulgence where the actors were so caught up in their awesome idea for a film they forgot to actually WRITE SOME WITTY DIALOG! Seriously, the scene between Franco and McBride about leaving loads all over the place was humorous for the first 5 seconds, but hey...why not stretch this 7th grade humor out another 2 minutes? The audience will LOVE it because WE think it's funny and WE ARE SO AWESOME!
I found it offensive, not for the subject matter, but for how they treat the audience. Rogan thinks his jokes about 'playing the same character in every movie' somehow make it excusable to sit back and do it again? This is a lazy sophomoric stupid humorless pile of stinking garbage that makes me feel bad about losing the 60 minutes of my life I lost before coming out of my coma and walking out.
Rogan and crew, even though they DO play the same characters all the time, can at LEAST feel good that they have some witty dialog in their movies. In this movie, I was waiting for that but it never came. When the sinkhole opened up, I wished I would've been able to fall in and surrender to the sweet release of death rather than endure any more of this circle-jerk ego trip.
From someone who is a fan of the original and actually has seen this remake, I can honestly say I enjoyed this film. It was a lot of fun, filled with heartfelt and genuinely funny moments. I LOVED that this starred a lot of popular Mexican actors, like Eugenio Derbez, and showcased what they can do to a main stream American audience. They were able to make me laugh in English and Spanish and I appreciated that their conversations were authentic and relatable to everyone that sees it. Definitely not one to miss!#8222
For all of you who are wondering if this will even come close to capturing the magic of the original Muppet movie, I just have one thing to say to you: go see this movie!!!!! I was a little worried myself that this movie would not be great, but tonight, I gave it a chance. And I left with a smile on my face. :) The story is that Gary (Jason Segel), Mary (Amy Adams), and Walter (the new Muppet) decide to take a trip down to Los Angeles; Walter wants to see the Muppet studios, but Mary and Gary are going for their 10th year anniversary of dating. There, they discover the oil tycoon Tex Richman's (Chris Cooper) plan to tear down the Muppet theater. That's when they decide to get the Muppets gang back together, and to put on one last show to raise enough money to save the theater. I'll let you put two and two together now.
Warning: This just might be my longest review so far on this website. That's right: I loved this film so much that I have to ramble on and on about how much I love it.
Let me first start off with the behind-the-scenes work. Jason Segel, I applaud you. You believed in this movie more than anybody else, and it is why they trusted you, my man. Thank you so much for everything you have done on this film; the result is that kids are now laughing at the Muppets, while adults are reminiscing about the old days when Kermit, Fozzie, Miss Piggy, Gonzo, and the rest would come into their TV's and bring laughter into their homes. Both generations are coming out with smiles on their faces. As for the rest of the crew, thank you so much for doing your job right. I am so happy that cgi and 3d was not used here, so thank you for not incorporating those elements.
Now, to the actors (the human actors). Jason Segel and Amy Adams are perfectly corny in this, but it works here, because it's the muppets! Their little story on the side was great; it was not overplayed, it was just right. I won't spoil what this side-story is, but trust me, you'll enjoy it. Chris Cooper was perfectly evil here. I would say that he was one of the most evil characters in the history of the Muppets, but even he gets a song in this movie.
Speaking of the songs, they are all so great and corny here. From the new songs, like "Life's a Happy Song," to the great old ones, like (yes, you are hearing this right) "The Rainbow Connection." They even have the celebrities in this movie singing "Mahna Mahna" in the credits. Loved every bit of it.
And finally, the stars themselves: the Muppets. The trailers did emphasize Jason Segel and Amy Adams, but make no mistake, this is a Muppet film, and the whole entire gang was back. Kermit is still the normal Muppet trying to pull it all together, Fozzie still has a bad sense of humour, Miss Piggy is still very selfish, Gonzo is still trying to perform dangerous stunts, Animal still plays the drums, Rowlf still plays the piano, and all the others are doing their thing. But, let's not forget the newest addition to this wonderful gang: Walter. If you guys are wondering if whether or not he is worth watching, guess what, he is worth it! He is a really likable character, who grew up watching the muppets, and therefore has found them to be his place in life. He is a very nice addition to the family, and I welcome him aboard.
Simply put, I can't stress on how great this film is. Forget about Twilight; The Muppets is where it's at! Everything about this film is great! Honestly, I don't know why Frank Oz said that he felt like this film did not focus on character development of the Muppets. Um Frank, I believe that the Muppets have been around for around 35 years now; I don't think they need that much more character development. Simply put, this movie is great. Kids will love the Muppets, and Adults will remember why they loved the muppets when they were growing up. My only complaint is that this movie should have been longer, but that's barely a complaint, since I enjoyed the movie so much that I will give it a 10/10. That's right, a 10/10 for me! Welcome back, muppets!
On it's own it's a goofy yet poignant musical. A little boring, if I'm being honest.
But with the name "Chi-Raq" and it being set in Chicago and it dealing with the gun violence in Chicago, the movie is worse than just bad. Chiraq is a real term that real kids in real bad neighborhoods came up with to describe their environment. Chicago's murder rate doesn't look like much when taken as a whole but when you realize that 99% of it occurred in just a few of Chicago's many neighborhoods, you'll understand why those unfortunate kids from those neighborhoods chose this term. These are not white neighborhoods, mind you, remember that Chicago is the most segregated city in America. These kids really have seen more literal dead bodies growing up than most soldiers have seen in Iraq. The term is as offensive and loud as possible because it's meant to get your attention. It is a very literal cry for actual help in every sense of the word.
Spike Lee takes this term and honors the meaning behind it by completely ignoring those cries for help. He chooses to use Chicago to tell some story about how a sex strike maybe solved a civil war one time so yeah that could totally solve all the dead bodies that pile up in Englewood and Fuller Park every year. And the corrupt governmental system keeping it secret and confined to black neighborhoods.
The most obvious example of Spike Lee completely missing what's really going on in the *real* Chiraq is the fact that the gangs in his film beef over colors. Don't nobody care what colors you wear in Chiraq, your chances of being killed are the same regardless. That's some goofy west coast crap. Modern gangs in the real Chiraq form simply out of safety in numbers. Activities vary set by set, block by block. Conflict typically stems from disputes over sex and violence. This is what motivates *most* violence in America, however when it happens on the South Side, it gets labeled "gangland violence" and then gets mostly ignored by media outlets.
Simple things get overlooked like how a lot of these deaths could be avoided simply by building a closer trauma center to these neighborhoods so it doesn't take an ambulance over an hour to get to the scene. How more educational and work force centers can provide direction to directionless kids with no hope. How proper legal representation and education could ensure we're not occasionally sending innocent kids to jail to learn how to become a savage along with the rest of them. These are all common things you'll find missing from most of these consistently super high crime areas in Chicago.
It's gotten bad in Chicago. And when I say bad, I mean real bad. Someone needs to shine a light on what's really going on because it's gone way beyond any other place in America. Way worse than you're imagining. The only thing a sex strike would do on the South Side is make the already high sexual assault rate climb even higher. And that's just real talk.
Which Spike Lee's "Chi-Raq" continues to ignore by examining none of those things. In Spike Lee's world, it's almost like he's saying it's black people's fault the murder rate is so high in places like Austin and West Englewood. Like he's saying "You girls maybe need to stop putting out so much, that's the problem." 1 out of 10 stars, no sympathy for those who chose to ignore real cries for real help from an entire group of disenfranchised youth.
"Don't get caught. Don't get caught." Three high school friends have been backed into a corner. They need money, a lot of it, fast. Out of options they decide to simply rob a bank. They have the perfect target and things start smooth, but when one is recognized things take a turn for the worse. What started off as a way to get out of a jam now becomes a fight for survival. This movie is a different take on the heist movie genre. The robbery takes 7 minutes, but during that time the reasons and back story of each robber is told through flashbacks and that really is a neat way to do this. Each person has their own story, which really helps in the emotional connection to every person involved. On the other side, that is really the only thing keeping this from being 100% generic. There are a few twists in this but nothing mind blowing. All that said this is actually a decent movie to watch, but I found my mind wandering every once in a while. On the plus side this wasn't all that convoluted of a plot and even zoning out for a few minutes I was able to understand what was going on. Overall, nothing terrible but nothing amazing either. I liked the use of flashbacks. I give this a C.